I'm freaking out...

So... I finally realized.. oh-em-gee I'm freaking getting out of high school this year... I mean.. what the fudge?! I'm like... ready and not ready... It's so hard to describe.. I'm kinda scared of what life is gonna be like.. weird I know... all I can think about is... "No, it can't be over.. but... but... It feels like I just started...." and I just... what once felt like I had all the time in the world... it's all gone now.. el-oh-el...

I went to the local Boys and Girls Club's annual turkey dinner tonight... I keep telling myself that I won't go next year and I always forget.... and end up going.. and tell myself once again.. "I won't come next year.. too many kids" not to mention.. the food is horrible.. I feel like baking cookies tonight... el-oh-el

So as for school.. Ms. Frank is still the same... We work, we listen, we leave and BAM 1st period is gone... like the wind

Ms. Davis is pretty cool, I really like being her helper.. I swear to you I'm meant to be a secretary or something because I love to copy papers, and be ordered around.. Kinky I know hehe...

Wu Lao Shi is alright.. I hate how she actually makes me learn stuff... well I shouldn't put it that way.. I hate how she expects me to know everything and then gets disappointed when I forget something... but I guess thats everybody, eh?

4th is my Talk To Erick time.. or TTE... I think honestly.. thats my most valued time of the day... I love how I feel I can trust Erick with anything.. He always seems so understanding and almost nonjudgemental.. It's kind of relaxing.. I've never really felt like that before... I totally believe he's my best friend

Then English.. Ms. Breyer, honestly... your class is really kind of easy... I mean for the most part you give us assignments as if we don't speak English or something.. and then you expect them due on a day and keep extending it... I mean wow

Well instead of going to lunch I go to the library which really relaxes me too. I love to be surrounded by all the books, and listen to the quiet. It's really nice, suprizingly.. It must be my solitary life coming back to me, from the split of.. Kattie...

In photography I'm actually having fun.. And I took some totally cute pics of myself.. hehe... weird because I hate taking pics of myself... but somehow I think I'm slowly gaining in confidence... oh-em-gee... I THINK I'M GETTING A SLIGHT EGO...

Then the blissed 8th period.. last and final... Hehe, I sit next to Omie... and Erick is right behind me.. I love that almost free period... I will miss it.. it's like my own little wind down time with my friends, el-oh-el.. You know what I mean Erick <3 Where we're just sitting there listening to Monique go on about her "book club" Oh yea...

Then I hit home.. and actually it's standable these days... I guess with Kattie not around to constantly compare myself to, I've finally accepted who I am.. and though I can be a bitch at times.. and most definately not the nicest person in the world.. I'm not the worst.. I'm actually a pretty ok person when I get to know myself...

Still looking for love... but who isn't? I've pretty much given up... I mean it'll get here when it wants to and if it doesn't.. Hey I still have my cats... So all in all.. I guess life is worth living after all, eh?